March 11, 2006

On Being Picture-Perfect

I am watching a mother who is carrying a large diaper bag and a very small camera. She is arguing with her two-year-old son over why he should not be walking on the sidewalk. He is not wearing shoes. “You will burn your feet,” his mother says. He doesn’t appear to care. “Let’s put your shoes on so you don’t hurt your feet.” The boy continues walking, running, stopping, bending over. He touches the grass, looks at the sky, wanders over to a bench, walks back on the sidewalk. The mother’s one-sided argument continues. The boy continues walking, paying no attention to his mother although I am paying full attention now. I have heard it’s pointless to try to reason with a two-year-old so there’s a story in here somewhere.

Not only does the mother want him to put on his shoes, she wants him to wear a hat. “It’s your birthday,” she says, “and I want to take a picture because you’re two years old now. Please wear this hat. PLEASE.”
It is an ugly hat, and here is the problem: his mother has turned the entire picture-taking process into a contest. I see this clearly from my point of view beneath a tree, pretzel in hand. I see this clearly from my point of view of being alone in the park, responsible today for my own self only, walking wherever I please with my shoes on or off and from never having had to argue with a two-year old!

The father shows up. Birthday boy’s parents gear into bribe mode to get their picture, when his picture would be so much better. He is small and blond with a round baby face. This is a sunny day, clouds high in the sky. He wants to run. He wants to roll in the grass and put his hands in the dirt.

His parents put him on a bench and push the hat on his head. They promise him pizza. They promise him ice cream. They make him sit for the photos, one, two, three. The boy squeals in that “let me go” way children have. The mother frowns; she adjusts the birthday hat. I laugh at the fact it’s a crown. And then I ponder the way in which birthday boy’s mother is not alone in the world: so many of us fight to take the pictures we want instead of the pictures that are happening right in front of us. Point well-taken on living life joyfully, just the way it comes.

Jenneth Wright