April 19, 2011

True Happiness Comes from Within

Read: Matthew 6:19-23

When I started studying for the Bar Exam last summer, it soon became very clear to me that if I didn’t start cutting out some time to relax and reflect each day, I would most likely end up certifiably insane by the time July rolled around. And so, I practiced yoga. I indulged in the occasional $10 chair massage from the nail salon down the street. I tried (mostly unsuccessfully) to meditate each morning for at least 15 minutes.

Perhaps most useful were the audiobooks I downloaded, which I listened to every day while I walked my dog. I listened to the “Seven Spiritual Laws” from Deepak Chopra and learned about “The Art of Happiness” from the Dalai Lama. Toward the end of my long reign of studying, my mom (perhaps sensing my possible nervous breakdown herself) sent a care packaged filled with books – including “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” and other books of that nature.

Despite the various authors from different walks of life, it seemed all of these books had the same underlying theme: most of what we THINK is important in life simply isn’t.  Most of what we THINK defines us doesn’t. While this idea wasn’t exactly new to me, it took on a new meaning against the backdrop of studying for what I thought was a life-defining, do-or-die exam. If I were to fail, I once thought, it was the sort of setback that made ME a failure as well.

I began to understand, as the summer went on, that whether I passed an exam or not, it wouldn’t define who I am. When I did pass (phew), but then found myself unemployed for close to five months (with all of one measly interview to my name), it was perhaps even more difficult to remember that whether or not I had a job did not define me, either. And when things got especially difficulty, and I was feeling especially dejected, I tried to remember back to the “laws” I learned over the summer – and I’m not talking about the ones that were tested on the bar exam. 

Practice non-judgment (even of yourself). Accept people, situations and events as they occur. Trust that there is a reason things don’t always go your way. Seek your higher self. Practice compassion. Remember that true happiness comes from within. Relinquish your attachment to titles and possessions. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

These teachings aren’t based exclusively in Christianity. But in the spirit of Lent, which evokes self-reflection, sacrifice, and ultimately, renewal, I thought I would share those teachings that inspired me. I use them as daily reminders that most of my worries are wasteful, and that a person can only be truly happy once they are truly happy having nothing at all.
(I know, easier said than done. But worth consideration every once-in-awhile).

Beth Filice